No, there is not.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it’s true. Not everyone in the world can be swingers. The reasons as to why someone would refuse to partake in a decidedly fun adventure are plentiful, and each one is easy to understand. Perhaps there is a morality issue that he or she (most likely she — let’s be honest here) can’t overcome. Religious beliefs may or may not be a huge part of that. Maybe your girlfriend doesn’t want to be with another man, period. Or perhaps you don’t like the idea of seeing your woman taking it long and hard from a different guy. Quite frankly, jealousy in a big issue when it comes to swinging. If you can’t trust each other, it’s probably not a good idea to begin the lifestyle.
But let’s say that you have trust, there are no religious or moral issues to overcome, and your relationship is ironclad. How do you broach the subject without getting slapped in the face?
To be honest, you’re going to have to with your gut. Each person is different, which is why there is no surefire way to bring it up. It’s probably not a good idea to be hanging out watching your favorite movie together and blurt out, “You wanna fuck other people, honey?” And definitely don’t say something about it during or right after sex. The only surefire thing that will accomplish is a slap in the face.
If you’re interested in swinging and you want to open up your significant other, then watch his or her “tells” that she might be interested in the opposite sex. Being with another woman is, without a doubt, the biggest reason why women are open to it. Many don’t want to be with a woman on their own, except maybe a little kissing and touching, but the idea of putting on a show for two men can be intoxicating. So while you’re in the dating part of your relationship or even after you’ve settled into a bit of a routine, watch for signs that she might be interested in women. Some may be easier to spot than others.
At some point, you’re just going to have to bite the bullet and bring up the subject of bisexual interaction. My husband attests that every single woman he has dated for more than a couple of months has revealed that she has either messed around with a woman or wants to do so. It is a very common thing, but you need to know where your woman stands. From there, you can tell her how hot it would be to watch her be with a woman, even if it was just making out. Then, if it interests you, ask her about being with a couple. But always make it about her. Avoid being too eager or she’s simply think you want to fuck other women with her blessing. Instead, if you’re comfortable with her fucking another guy — and if you’re not, then you’re a hypocrite, in my opinion — tell her how hot it would be to watch a guy enjoy what you enjoy whenever you want. Women eat that shit up … and for most men, it’s absolutely true, anyway.
For the ladies, you might encounter the same thing — your guy might just think that you’re looking for a way to fuck other men. This is a much easier hump to get over. All you need to do is explain that if you wanted to do this only because you wanted to fuck another guy, you’d simply go to the nearest bar and find a willing participant within ten minutes. Less, if your nipples are poking through your shirt.
The important thing to remember, for both sides of the gender pool, is that swinging isn’t just about sex — though that is obviously a big part of it — it’s about having an adventure together. After the first time my husband and I were with a couple, we woke up the next morning and felt closer together than we ever had before. We had shared something that not too many couples have. And it’s important to emphasis that sharing with your significant other.
As with all things, communication is the key to success. But, above all, if your spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc. is definitely not into it, unfortunately, it’s best not to press the issue. That will only drive the other person away.
As I’ve been writing the 5th book of the Full Swap series, which will catch us up on our adventures thus far, I’ve realized that there is definitely something to be said when it comes to youth versus experience.
The thing is, it sounds hot to be with people — especially girls — that are really young. My husband would agree, seeing as how we’re several years apart. When we first met, I couldn’t even legally drink. So when we search for a new couple, it’s hard to resist youth. If we were looking for a couple to hang out with on a regular basis, that would be one thing. But simply getting them into bed? Robbing the cradle is absolutely enticing. Everything is new and fresh. Not only their bodies, but also their experiences. Showing a couple what is really possible during sex can be quite an attractive prospect.
The biggest negative aspect of this is the same as one of the positives — experience. Although it may be enticing to be with a young couple for nothing more than their age and the fact that nothing’s started to get saggy or wrinkly yet, many young couples don’t know what they’re doing. They know that the penis goes into the vagina, and they’ve watched some porn, but there’s much to it than that. An older couple, one that has a bit more experience in life itself, not just sex, can lead to a more enjoyable time. For the most part, they’ll also be quite a bit more mature and less nervous when you get together.
Of course, you really have to go with your gut and maybe get a little risky, because there are no guarantees. If you have a bad time once or twice, that comes with the territory. It’s best to feel out each couple on an individual basis. I’ve found that some older guys can be quite crude from the get-go, whereas the younger guys are excited just to have sex in the first place, not to mention seeing their girl being intimate with another girl.
When in doubt, talk it over with your significant other and make a decision together.
I promise that I’ll be posting some actual discussions about the lifestyle soon, rather than just hawking my books. I’m just trying to get through the rest of our adventures while they’re still fresh in my memory. We were with a couple a little over a week ago, which gives me enough material to get through a fifth volume. I’ll be relieved to catch up, to be honest, because I have plenty of other things I’m trying to write. Plus, you know, my day job. Which is more writing. lol
Anyway, here is the cover to Volume Four: Double Dipping. This one concerns repeat encounters of people we’ve been with before. This is the first encounter that doesn’t follow a chronological order, and a couple of them are kinda short. Which is why I put in four different stories this time around. The next volume will only have three, but they’re much more involved.
Yes, I’ve been out of the loop lately. I’ve been swamped with work, not to mention finishing my third volume of our swinging adventures. Plus, I’ve changed the titles to use the word “volume” instead of “year.” Using year one and year two were fine in the beginning, but since they’re not really accurate at this point, I decided that a change was needed.
If you want to check out Volume Three, go here: http://tinyurl.com/fullswap3
And here are my new, updated covers, although I’m thinking about redoing them completely to make them sexier. For now, though, that will have to be on the back burner.
When I include a date of release of future books in a current book, I have every intention of hitting those dates. But, as everyone knows, life sometimes gets in the way. Which means that my books have been delayed.
The third Full Swap will be released by the end of August. The third — and final –Gangbang Geek book will be released in September. As for the untitled series that I’ve been developing … I have no idea. These are much more involved stories and each issue will be approximately twice the size, if not more, than the others I’ve worked on. So those might be delayed until early next week, but I promise they will be worth the wait.
Anyway … just wanted to give anyone who might be interested a heads-up.
Hello everyone! I’m so sorry that I haven’t been posting recently. My husband and I decided to relocate and we literally found a place, packed, and moved everything in precisely three weeks. We didn’t hire movers — we rented a truck and did it all ourselves because that’s how we roll.
The good news is that I was able to finish the second Full Swap book — Full Swap: The True Story of a Swinging Couple, Year Two: Learning Curve — and it’s now available on amazon right here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00DP8HSKO.
I promise I’ll post again within the next few days, but for now, here is a look at the cover:
Just a few days ago, I finished and published the first book of my second series, Full Swap: The True Story of a Swinging Couple. You can find it by clicking here. This is all about the first year of our true swinging adventures. There are no couple encounters (that will be featured in the next issue, which I’ll start writing later this month), but there are a trio of threesomes to enjoy.
Most of the details are true. The only thing I changed was the name of the person involved, because it’s important that I protect the people I write about (and don’t get sued). I like to think that the sex is pretty hot … although, admittedly, it does get hotter later on, once we bring in couples.
Anyway … celebrate, I got a new haircut and bought a new dress. I’m not really too much of a girly-girl (which is why I don’t get mani-pedis), but I thought I deserved a little treat.
I hope everyone out there who is following my blog is doing well. Thanks for listening, and if you have any questions about our adventures, feel free to ask.
Oh, and here’s the cover to the book…